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What is 2+2? 

Burnt-Out Again

January 25th, 2010

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We probably don’t always hit the nail on the head with our advice. (Okay, that’s fake modesty. We’re awesome.) But all amazing people need something to humanize them so they can connect with the masses. There’s nothing we can do about our stunning good looks and devil may care attitudes so we’re taking a crack at being wrong. Once.

We’re people people,
Jeff and Elliott


Dear Jeff and Elliott,

I’m still a smoker! I tried your previous advice but it didn’t stick. Actually, none of the normal stuff has worked for me even though I’m ready to quit. What can I do?

Surprisingly, Still Smoking

“Burnt-Out Again”

Dear Still Smoking,

We find it hard to believe, that our advice did not succeed
If those cigarettes, still can’t resist ‘em, now it’s time for the buddy system

Smokers far and wide listen up, find a friend that you really trust
You gotta trust ‘em. Trust ‘em good

Like if you had kids you’d trust ‘em with your kids
But hopefully you don’t because that second hand smoke (is really bad for little-kid lungs)

[Casual Conversation]

So every time your friend tries to smoke, punch ‘em in the dick until they don’t.*

*Note: Don’t discriminate, a good dick-punch is an effective counter-measure regardless of gender!

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