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What is 2+2? 

You’re on the Internet

August 24th, 2009

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For people who’ve grown up with the internet as an integral part of popular culture it can seem innocuous enough. (Even though many of us know that there are dark, dark, corners!) And it’s easy to write off the concern of the older generations as lack of knowledge and superstition. (“I heard from Ted’s mother that these Worlds Of Warcrimes or whatever are stealing his soul!”) Still, as with most things older people rant about, there’s often some truth to the matter. Be careful out there!

Keeping it careful and carefree (mutually exclusive!),
Jeff and Elliott

Dear Jeff and Elliott,

Settle an argument between my parents and myself. They’re getting all bent out of shape about Facebook! They keep lecturing me about how I could “ruin my life” and I need to “be vigilant” about what goes on there. But I think they’re being overprotective. Help!

Flailing on Facebook

“You’re on the Internet”

Dear Flailing,

What happens in Vegas
Is supposed to stay in Vegas
Unless you’re an idiot
And take pictures of it

But what goes on the internet
Could end up anywhere
You’ve got no control of it
So watch what you put on it

Just because you put those pictures where you thought they were safe
Doesn’t mean they won’t end up in the most unlikely place
And anything you do could easily outlast your say
Could come and bite you in the ass one day

‘Cause one day you’ll apply for a very important job
And you’ll wonder why you didn’t get the very important job
And you’ll call to find out why you didn’t get that job
And they’ll say they found pictures of you giving jobs

On the internet
You’re on the internet
It’s a series of tubes
With a dancing Boba Fett

On the internet
You’re on the internet
Invented by Al Gore
(That’s not really what he said)

Yeah on the internet the sense of anonymity
Can leave you with the feeling you can be what you want to be
But you should take the same precautions you would anywhere
And make sure it’s safe to let down your hair

Is it really productive in the long run
To make a permanent monument of some temporary fun
We agree that everybody makes mistakes
But there’s no need to engrave ‘em into cyberspace

On the internet
You’re on the internet
With the talking cats
Bad grammar they has

On the internet
You’re on the internet
Everyone’s an 18 year old girl
Who wants to chat

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